Living with Skeletons: Dr. Hannah Gould on the Secret Life of Ashes

At PlotBox, we’re constantly looking for ways to better understand the evolving landscape of the deathcare industry, so we can continue helping you navigate it effectively.

Recently, we had the pleasure of partnering with our friends at Australasian Cemeteries & Crematoria Association (ACCA) and NZ Cemeteries & Crematoria Collective (NZCCC) Ngā Rau Hotu to host a fascinating instalment of our APAC webinar series. We were joined by Dr. Hannah Gould, a renowned cultural anthropologist and fellow with the DeathTech Research Team at the University of Melbourne, alongside NZCCC Chair Daniel Crisp.

In a thought-provoking session titled "Living with Skeletons in the Closet," Dr. Gould unpacked the early findings of a major pilot study exploring a question our sector rarely asks: what are families actually doing with cremated remains once they leave our facilities?

For cemetery and crematoria professionals, Hannah's insights reveal a shift in how modern families are navigating grief, memorialisation, and the physical remains of their loved ones. Here's a look at what we learned.

The Missing "Cultural Script"

It might surprise you to learn that Australia is home to the world’s oldest evidence of cremation, dating back 40,000 years. Yet, the shift to widespread industrial cremation is incredibly recent, only overtaking burial as the majority practice in the 1990s. Today, Australia is a 'cremation nation', cremating up to 80% of their population and producing roughly 400,000 kilograms of ash every year.

Dr. Gould highlighted that because this transition happened over a single generation, society hasn't yet developed a strong 'cultural script'. In many other cultures, there are strict timelines and traditions for handling ashes. In Australia however, when families pick up ashes from the crematorium, they are met with a range of options. Overwhelmed by choice, they often default to doing nothing at all. As a result, ashes frequently enter the home and simply remain there.

The 5 Typologies of Ash Holders

When Dr. Gould’s team put out an open call for their research, they were overwhelmed by the number of people eager to anonymously confess their deep (and sometimes embarrassing) secrets about how they store ashes.

Hannah's team identified five distinct typologies of ash holders:

• Scatterers: Those who keep ashes in the home for a brief period before carrying out a planned scattering event.
  
  
• Sprinklers: Families who slowly scatter the ashes of their loved one in multiple locations globally over an extended period.
  
  
• Displayers: A small minority who actively display ashes in the home, often triggered by the tragic death of a child or a beloved pet.
  
  
• Hoarders: The largest group in the survey. These individuals keep ashes hidden away under beds, on top of cabinets, or in utility cupboards simply because they do not know what to do with them.
  
  
• Distributors: People who make an active decision to divide the remains among siblings or children.

Surprising Findings: Pets, Vegemite Jars, and the 'Plastic Box' Trap

Some takeaways challenged our traditional assumptions about memorialisation:

• Non-Human kin: Over 50% of the survey responses included descriptions of animal ashes. We are seeing families co-displaying human and pet ashes, or intentionally delaying memorialisation - waiting for a spouse or a family pet to pass away so all the ashes can be handled together.
  
  
• DIY vessels: Forget traditional urns. Dr. Gould’s research showed that ashes are being stored in everyday household items, including Tupperware, biscuit tins, Milo tins, and even Vegemite jars!
  
  
• The Polyurethane trap: The physical container matters. Dr. Gould noted that if families do not transfer the ashes out of the standard blue polyurethane box provided by the crematorium within the first few weeks, those ashes are highly likely to remain hoarded in the home for years, if not decades.

What This Means for the Deathcare Sector

Historically, academics feared a 'McDonaldization' of death: a future where secularisation led to cookie-cutter, standardised funerals. But as we discussed during the webinar, the opposite is proving true. Families are highly creative, seeking unique approaches to memorialisation.

However, because ashes demand very little of people in terms of space or upkeep, families often need an external prompt to finally make a decision. This is where we as an industry can step in.

Dr. Gould suggests that cemeteries and crematoria have a unique opportunity to help guide these families. Whether it’s hosting dedicated scattering days, community remembrance events, or even an 'Ash Amnesty' day, we can provide the gentle prompt families need to bring their loved ones out of the closet and into a final, meaningful resting place.

Watch the webinar on-demand

Did you miss the live session? You can catch up on the recording via this link.